I have older relatives who openly brag about how much they used to drunk-drive the back county roads of southern Alabama. They laugh as they reminisce about swerving along, cops occasionally pulling them over but only to tell them to “be careful” and “get on home.”
Needless to say, the times they are a-changin’, even in backwoods Alabama. DUIs and DWIs are now no freaking joke in this country. Getting one is like getting a prison sentence, not to mention a hefty bill to go along with it. Oh and lest we forget the bigger picture, YOU COULD KILL SOMEONE ELSE OR YOURSELF.
But it wasn’t always Breathalyzers and blood tests. Drinking and driving is as old as, well, driving. The only thing that’s changed is the degree to which we can get away with it.
Long Before MADD
A recent piece in the New York Daily News details the history of drunk-driving and how it’s evolved over the last century. Back in the day (early 1900s-ish), policemen used a similar tactic to what’s used today: field sobriety tests. This method can be best described as, “You’re not drunk? Prove it with this obstacle course.” But in the early days of automobiles, the sobriety test also involved verbal sparring. According to Barron Lerner, an New York University professor and historian interviewed by the NY Daily News, the cop would ask the suspected drunk driver to repeat the words “Methodist Episcopal” three times in a row. Seems like a reasonable enough test, although it would probably be a religious rights violation nowadays. I’ve heard of cops asking people to spell the alphabet backward but I don’t know anyone who can do that stone cold sober.
After that came a fingertip prick blood test some Swede invented. ‘Merica never took to that one though. Then there was something called the Drunkometer, which was created in 1937 by a professor at Indiana University and described as “the very first stable breath-testing instrument to measure alcohol levels.” There was a lot of breathing and a lot of chemical reactions but the device ultimately proved too bulky. State troopers and nighttime patrol peeps like to pack light when they hunt for hammered people.
Buzzed Driving is Drunk Driving
Then in 1954, the Drunkometer inventor got upstaged by another IU professor (don’t know if they crossed passed on campus, y’all) who invented the Breathalyzer, also known as the demise of buzzed driving as we know it. I remember all the times I’d drink then drive by saying to myself, “It’s one of those times where I’m fine but if I got pulled over, I’d be screwed.” I said that all the time. By “fine,” I meant not shit-housed out of my mind but probably not equipped to safely drive either. But thanks to the Breathalyzer, it doesn’t matter how relatively sober you feel. If you blow over .08, you’re screwed.
DUI costs and the legal system aside, the roads are all around less dangerous now, with the number of drunk-driving accidents and fatalities having sharply declined since the 1980s. Groups like Mothers Against Drunk Driving (MADD) have also helped a lot, no matter how many prom nights they may have ruined by over-policing the party.
From Breathalyzer to Breathometer
We’ve come really far in the fight against drunk-driving. Honestly, I straight-up judge people now when I find out they drink and drive—and that’s not a sober, high-horse position. It’s only because there are so many options to avoid it in 2015. If you know you’re gonna drink, plan ahead, my friends. Uber and Lyft are among a number of cheap, unbelievably user-friendly ride share options. If you don’t live in a city where these companies operate, I’m sorry, but add every taxi cab company in town to your phone contact list!
There’s also the Breathometer, otherwise known as The Best Invention of All Time. It’s basically a Breathalyzer for your smart phone. It even tells you when your breath is foul then spits out mints. I might have made up the second half of the previous sentence but the bad breath alert part is true.
Who said technology is ruining us all? Okay, no one except my mom, but here’s a legit reason to have that mini computer constantly glued to your hand. Or you could just drink at home. Because who really wants to leave the sofa when there is so much TV to watch right now?
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