Watching drunk animals make asses out of themselves really seems to entertain people, as evidenced by the many videos you’ll find when you search “drunk cat” or “drunk cat” on YouTube. While it’s innocent enough that some film their kitties after they’ve come out from under anesthesia because they’re oh-so-cute when dopey and sort of tripping over themselves, the amusement can quickly become downright disturbing.
We’ve already covered some jerks in Russia who fed enslaved bears beer, which turned them into alcoholics. A similar fate met Nicolas, a tufted capuchin monkey from Santiago, Chile.
Enough With the Monkey Business
Nicolas was abused by his owners who thought it was just a riot to feed him both beer and cigarettes to the point where he’d lash out in anger during drunken fits.
“They liked to see his reactions when he drank. He became more aggressive, and that made them laugh,” said Nicole Rivera Helbig, Nicolas’s treating veterinarian. “Alcohol, cigarettes and drugs are the most common things [abusive owners]give to monkeys, because they see it as a game,” she added.
One thing is certain—Nicolas’s owners were completely fucked in the head. Not only did they think it was funny to shove alcohol and cigarettes into his mouth, they also removed his fangs. Imagine trying to navigate life without your teeth. Luckily for Nicolas, there happened to be a rehab for monkeys just like him in the city of Penaflor, right outside of Santiago. There, he found the help he needed to get off the sauce.
Hope for the Hopeless
At the Primate Rehabilitation Centre, Elba Munoz helps abused monkeys heal from their pasts in a comforting environment that’s filled with lush natural foliage any monkey would love. There are 150 primates in treatment at the center who all suffered abuse at the hands of humans.
“Here, monkeys learn that they are monkeys,” Munoz said. “When they’re in [abusive]homes they aren’t monkeys, they can’t develop the normal behaviors of their species. So they’re not monkeys. And they’re not children either. They’re nothing.”
Nicolas had to take antidepressants to wean off the booze. He was fed so much alcohol that his body got accustomed to it and going without brought on some serious anxiety. Between the antidepressants, some love from the caretakers and time to frolic freely in the foliage with other primates, Nicolas got sober and is officially in recovery.
A Problem that Needs to Stop
That anyone would feed a helpless furry creature alcohol to the point where it becomes addicted is shocking. Especially to those of us who are recovering alcoholics and know all-too-well the misery of constantly needing to knock back some booze to feel okay in the head.
The mechanism for addiction in our human brains is in the lower portion, the limbic system, also known as the “mammalian brain.” So it makes sense that animals can get hooked just as easily as we can. It actually helps remind us that compulsively guzzling booze is not so much a matter of will power as it is a biological reaction. Addiction affects bears, cats, dogs, and yes, our close cousins the primates, the same way it affects humans.
Thankfully, animal rights workers and veterinarians recognize that getting animals addicted to alcohol is no laughing matter, that it is in fact abuse. They also know specialized treatment is necessary for them to recover. As of now, this treatment just involves detox, antidepressants and some good old-fashioned R&R. But if news breaks that AA meetings for monkeys are starting, we’ll let you know ASAP.
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