People get sober in all sorts of ways. Sometimes they just quit on their own. Sometimes they go to rehab. They show up in 12-step rooms, ashrams, churches and their parents’ basements. There is no one right way—something we’ve aimed to show in our collection of How I Got Sober stories. While we initially published these as either first person essays by our contributors or as interviews with anonymous sober folks, we eventually began to realize that there were other stories to tell: yours. This is our reader spotlight and this, more specifically, is Rob:
Click here to see all of our How I Got Sober stories. Do you want to be featured in How I Got Sober? Email us here for details.
What is your sobriety date?
September 22, 2012
Where did you get sober?
North Carolina
When did you start drinking?
I started drinking when I was around 14 or 15.
How would you describe your life before you quit drinking?
My life was a “shit show” before I finally stopped drinking. I’d have some good runs—several years even—and then boom! Something would happen. It took years before I would eventually lose it all.
What were your childhood and teenage years like?
I had a happy childhood and grew up in a loving family. Alcohol was always a staple at family gatherings and the disease runs through both sides of my family. But I believe as much as addiction can run in a family, so can recovery.
When did you first think you might have a problem?
I backed into a police squad car drunk as a senior in high school—probably a good indication I was headed down the wrong path very early on. Just eight months later, I was in college and was arrested for disorderly conduct/resisting arrest while I was drunk.
How did you rationalize your drinking?
I always rationalized my drinking as a reward. I worked hard and partied hard. It was the way I had learned to cope with stress and anxiety early on. It was my escape, along with my “shot” of self-confidence.
What do you consider your bottom?
My bottom was a rough one. I lost everything I had in under 60 minutes standing in front of the Apple Store in Milwaukee, Wisconsin. I know Steve Jobs set out to change the world; well he changed my life. I was an Emmy award winning investigative reporter, who was caught pissing on the Apple Store drunk. I was just a few feet from the front door of my house. It was the end of a three to four day bender. My ex-wife, who is a CNN news anchor, had written a tell-all book about our marriage and divorce. She had just appeared on Dr. Drew’s show and after six months of her promoting the book and doing interviews, I lost it. I cussed out the cops, so instead of maybe getting a warning, I got the super value meal: mug shot, video of the arrest, video of the book and 911 call. My bottom would eventually make it to the Internet and the “shit show” traveled the world. I resigned from my job and left for rehab.
Where did you go to rehab?
First Step in Monroe, North Carolina in January of 2005 and Fellowship Hall in Greensboro, North Carolina in 2012 for 90 days.
Did anything significant happen while in rehab that is important to your sobriety?
I realized I couldn’t go on living like this. My health was awful—blood pressure through the roof, overweight and pre-diabetic. I was a mess. Finally what helped me is that I understood this was a disease.
Did you go to AA? If so, what did you think of it at first? How do you feel about it now?
I went to AA; wasn’t impressed. The south was a difficult place and I didn’t feel any sense of support. I met a few good people in AA but for the most part they treated me like an outsider while I was in Greensboro. I tried and worked some steps but it never clicked. Now I live in Southern California and the recovery community is so supportive and non-judgmental. So I have been trying to give AA another chance.
What do you hate about being an alcoholic?
I’m grateful to be an alcoholic. I guess if there was one thing I hate about it, it’s that I waited so long to accept it and start changing my life.
What do you love about being an alcoholic?
I love my acceptance of being an alcoholic.
Do you have a sobriety mantra?
My mantra would be “Trust the process and have faith.”
What is the most valuable thing that has happened to you in recovery?
I love that I am able to chase my dreams and passions. I love the relationship I have with my family and friends now that I am sober.
If you could offer a newcomer or someone thinking about getting sober any advice, what would it be?
This is a marathon and not a sprint. Don’t give up because you never know what is around the next corner.
Photo provided by Rob; used with permission. Click here to read all of our How I Got Sober stories.
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