The term “addiction” gets thrown around quite liberally in our culture. It’s a running theme at this website, in case you hadn’t noticed, but we are obviously discussing it in its purest and most severe context. People casually confess they’re “addicted to their phone” or “addicted to INSERT CURRENT NETFLIX HIT here” but are these activities resulting in consequences so disastrous the rest of the person’s life is suffering? Probably not. I don’t know if the same can be said for someone who claims (publicly or otherwise) he or she is addicted to pornography.
Thinking It’s a Problem Is Creating a Problem
The Daily Beast recently posted another story about the lack of validity of real porn addiction in which the author referenced repeated stories they’ve run about this very fact. This one focuses on not only how there is no such thing as being addicted to porn but how people’s own perception that they’re addicted is actually causing the harm. According to the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Disorders, porn addiction is not an official addiction. However, a new finding from Psychology of Addictive Behaviors describes people’s belief that they’re addicted “irrespective of actual pornography use.” So they’re saying it’s everything revolving around watching porn and the feelings associated with it, as opposed to the actual on-screen bumpin’ and grindin,’ that’s causing the problem. And by “problem,” I’m referring to general distress to one’s psyche.
The researchers did two different experiments. In one, 713 admitted porn-watching adults were asked about both their viewing habits and their perceptions of porn addiction. Additionally, they had these same people participate in psych surveys that measure generalized levels of depression, anxiety, stress and anger. The other experiment processed the responses to these same tests with 106 college students, who took them twice, a year apart, “for longitudinal associations.” Both the undergrads and adults were also asked to take surveys centered solely on the neurosis around being truthful around personal information that could be perceived as socially stigmatized or embarrassing–that was the control for the whole experiment. The results indicate a correlation between perceived porn addiction and symptoms of depression, anxiety, anger and stress. The authors of the report suggest that although we shouldn’t disregard any clear signs of problematic behavior based on porn viewing, they do think treatment, if any, should be geared toward how people feel about porn watching rather than the actual porn watching.
Pain Is Pain Is Pain
I guess my question, is what’s the difference? So science says porn addiction isn’t real. Does it really matter if psychological distress is being caused by an addiction or a belief that you have an addiction? Either way, it’s psychological distress! Maybe if these people feel like they’re addicted to porn then we shouldn’t dismiss their feelings, or make them feel even worse, by telling them their addiction doesn’t exist? How is telling people, you can’t possibly be addicted to porn so you thinking you are is just making everything worse, supposed to make them feel better? If it were as simple as telling themselves, “Well, I guess none of the crippling attachment I feel to Porn Hub is legitimate because there is no such thing as porn addiction so no need to spend an excessive amount of time there and make other areas of my life unmanageable because that would quantify me as an addict—and porn addiction simply isn’t possible”—then we wouldn’t even be writing about the issue. (Seriously, what if we could just tell every addict their addiction is not real and thereby remove said addiction? A gal can dream.)
On the other end of the spectrum—what if insisting porn addiction isn’t a thing becomes an excuse for individuals to continue destructive behavior? If someone’s husband is chronically locking himself in the bathroom with a laptop but tells his wife to shut it when she protests “because porn addiction isn’t real,” will the issue ever be solved? I use this example because sadly I know more than a few women whose marriages have been ruined by a partner’s porn infatuation (is infatuation an okay word to use, scientists?).
Undeniable Side Effects…or Not
Official addiction status aside, the ample amounts of easily accessible porn people can consume are impacting sex lives, especially with the young men growing up on it. It creates unrealistic expectations for both parties involved in a sexual encounter. It’s certainly human nature to enjoy a check-out-of-reality-and-satisfy-one’s-horniness fix like porn. But I can see how the copious forms of it available and endless mediums through which we can see it are yet another detriment of too much technology, too much of the time.
Okay, Judge Judy here is gonna step down and acknowledge, I realize porn-watching can be a treasured pastime for many and obviously adults can do whatever the hell they want. If someone can watch it constantly and not feel their sex life is affected negatively, by all means have at it. I feel the same way about people who can overdo alcohol and drugs on the regular without blowing up the rest of their life. It’s totally your prerogative. But I don’t think we should dismiss any ill feelings someone starts to develop around an activity or escape that’s starting to make them feel powerless.
Sponsored DISCLAIMER: This is a paid advertisement for California Behavioral Health, LLC, a CA licensed substance abuse treatment provider and not a service provided by The Fix. Calls to this number are answered by CBH, free and without obligation to the consumer. No one who answers the call receives a fee based upon the consumer’s choice to enter treatment. For additional info on other treatment providers and options visit www.samhsa.gov.
