How I Got Sober: Matthew

How I Got Sober: Matthew

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Ardú Recovery Center is a detox and residential drug and alcohol treatment facility located in Provo, Utah. Treatment incorporates traditional approaches with cutting edge holistic modalities, including IV Amino Acid treatments, massage, yoga, Reiki, and more. In order to get a full picture of what the facility and experience is like, Rehab Reviews had the opportunity to chat with an alumni of the program to discuss how he got sober with the help of Ardú.

What is your first name?

Matthew

What is your sobriety date? 

March 7th, 2019

Where did you get sober? 

Ardú Recovery Center.

When did you start drinking? 

High school – 15 or 16.

How would you describe your life before you quit drinking? 

I was at the precipice of losing everything I had worked for, for nearly 20 years. I was spiraling out of control and had accepted the fact that I could not beat this challenge. I purchased more life insurance and started taking steps to ensure my wife and sons would have a fighting chance when I was gone. While doing all of this I could not come to grips with the fact that I was and am an alcoholic. I lied to myself, led a double life, and was drunk all the time.

What was your childhood like? 

Great. Two loving parents, five siblings. We were not rich but life was good. 

Teenage years? 

Extreme highs and extreme lows. I was popular, a good athlete, smart, and good looking. I had a lot of friends and on the outside I was confident—and for the most part I was, with the exception of a few abysmal insecurities that I both took medication and self-medicated to get by.

When did you first think you might have a problem? 

June of 2011.

How did you rationalize your drinking? 

Drinking made me a better person—to a point it really did. It helped me get through college and graduate school. It made it possible to sleep at night and to enjoy vacations and relaxing time with my family. This is not a rationalization. It is simply true that alcohol made me better, to a point. I can remember several times that my wife, my parents, my friends told me, “You need to have a drink and rethink this.” Then one day it no longer was beneficial. It no longer made me better.

What do you consider your bottom, i.e. a defining moment(s) that made you seek help? 

Drinking Peppermint Schnapps in the shower at 5 am. Knowing I needed it to function. Hating myself and my existence because of this fact. Knowing that I could not beat it. Knowing I would lose my job, my family, the respect of my community, and that I had already lost the respect I had for myself.

Did you go to rehab? 

Yes, Ardú Recovery. I was there in March of 2019 for 19 days.

Did anything significant happen while in rehab that is important to your sobriety (moment of clarity/ah-ha moment, turning point, change of heart, found Higher Power)? 

I learned it was okay to admit I had a problem. I found the Big Book and learned that it is truly an inspired text. I remembered my God, and that my life curiously started down this path when I stopped working on my relationship with him. I met people (the staff at Ardú) who truly understood what I was going through and let me figure me out. People who loved me from the very first time I met them.

Did you go to AA?

Yes. I liked it okay. I thought a lot of the people were full of shit, but it was a good time. Now, I love it! It has changed my life. I had the opportunity to visit the home of Dr. Bob, what a sacred place. I truly believe that AA is the greatest example of success in a social experiment in the modern world. Not just for issues with drinking, but as the 12th step says, “to practice these principles in all our affairs.”

What do you hate about being an alcoholic? 

The things I did and the person I was.

What do you love about being an alcoholic? 

I am a better person today because of this ailment. It has given me the chance and the desire to sincerely work on being a better, more rounded, human being, and in doing so given me focus on what is important. My fellow humans. Their victories, their defeats, their strengths, their weaknesses, and most importantly, their happiness, their utility. We are all in this together.   

What are the three best tools you have acquired to stay sober and happy? 

12-step work. Giving back. Focusing on others. Service. My relationship with my Higher Power, and the Big Book (that’s more than three).

Do you have a sobriety mantra? 

“Sometimes Slowly”

What is the most valuable thing that has happened to you in recovery? 

I learned to love me again.

Have you worked the 12 steps? 

Yes, they suck, but they are worth it.

If you could offer a newcomer or someone thinking about getting sober any advice, what would it be? 

Have a plan. Something has to change or you end up back where you were at. Have a plan, go to meetings, ask for help, and remember “Sometimes Slowly.” 

Any additional thoughts?

My recovery would not have even started if it were not for my wife and Amy (from Ardú). I owe these women more than I could ever hope to repay. They saved me! There are so many amazing people at Ardú it is hard to conceptualize it. So many great nurses, sincere technicians, exceptional counselors, and awesome cooks. As I sit here writing this response I see their faces, and I will not even try to describe the love I have for them, I am not capable of capturing it correctly.    

Learn more about Ardú Recovery Center at www.ardurecoverycenter.com. Reach Ardú Recovery Center by phone at (801) 823-6781. Find Ardú Recovery Center on Facebook

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