Everything About the World Is Awful…or Is It?
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Everything About the World Is Awful…or Is It?

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everything-is-terrible-or-is-itWorst year ever. Worst day ever. Worst Oscars ever. Worst Superbowl ever. Worst election ever. Worst whatever ever. It seems like everything I turn on or log on to or listen to is telling me how hard life is right now. Oh, and it’s been like this for a while. The overwhelming message being blasted out of life’s loud-speakers 24 hours a day is that life is terrible and every day is a struggle. In fact, our common distaste for how allegedly crappy it all is somehow binds us all together—but not in a good way.

I recently hung out with some coworkers where everyone just bitched about everything. And I mean everything; politics, our fellow co-workers, our work place, you name it. I left feeling like I needed to douse my ears with bleach and watch 40 continuous hours of classic Hollywood musicals just to get the sour, negative taste out of my mouth. Granted, it has been a challenging few months. There’s a lot to grieve and be worried about. Personally, my own life has been put through the 2016 juicer more than once and my head has been left spinning and heavy. Yet there’s something inherently contradictory about being in recovery and buying into this “The whole world is terrible!” narrative.

I know just as well as everyone else that it’s hard to be stay positive about the state of the human race. I am, after all, a homosexual male of Irish descent in his 40s who is also a writer, so being bitter and jaded about the world is basically my default setting. But even I’m not buying this massive craptastic blanket we’ve put on the state of the world.

First of all, I feel like anybody who has lived through the horrors of addiction and alcoholism knows what real hell looks like. Sure, right now might not be the most fun era in human history, but compared to waking up hungover and wanting to die like I did seven days a week for over 10 years, it’s a walk in the park. Honestly. Give me the choice between daily drinking again or living through 2016 again, and I’ll gladly choose the latter.

What I’m saying is a little perspective is needed when we go down this abyss of despair. I kicked a daily cocaine habit, quit drinking and left a toxic relationship, for goodness sakes. America being in the crapper is something I can handle. In fact, if anybody should be called on in our troubled times, I think it should be people in recovery. We’ve already seen it all and gotten out on the other side. We got this. Our strength, humor and “girl, calm down” demeanor could really be of service to normies (who cry over losing a parking spot) when they freak out in the months to come. When I step away from this Internet howling, sky-is-falling chatter, I realize I’ve been through worse and I turned out sort of okay, happy even.

Speaking of perspective, it helps me to remember that any day I stay sober is a pretty great day. I know. I know. Feel free to throw your laptop at that statement. Lord knows I nearly hung up on my sober bestie when he said, trying to comfort me in my first year, “Sometimes all we get is to stay sober.” But it’s true. Staying sober is huge especially when the world stinks and people are the worst.

Yet here we are and this is the only option, I mean the only real option that won’t kill me. When I first started going to meetings in Santa Monica, like clockwork, somebody would say, “We don’t pick up, no matter what.” I heard that over, and over again, and I’m thankful I did (even if I rolled my eyes at the time). Because what this whole not-picking-up-no-matter-what gig means is that I can’t drink over the state of the world, over humanity going to hell, over the president…over anything. I get to be sober and present for all of it—yippee. I joke but it is an enormous gift. I’ve recently watched as people still active in their addictions try to process the wacky world around them and it is not pretty. They keep pouring booze and drugs on their lives in hopes that it’ll make the world go away, but it never works. Never worked for me either.

Also? I would make a strong argument for the world not really being that awful to begin with. Let’s start with the seemingly superficial but nevertheless miraculous: pandas are no longer endangered, the Earth actually has a second moon and new HIV treatments are pushing the world closer to a cure. Fantastic! But we can go deeper. If you aren’t one of the 30,000 people who died of a heroin overdose in 2015, then you are doing alright. Likewise, if you weren’t one of the 88,00 people to die in an alcohol related death, you are rocking it. Yay for not dying! But I really think we can do even better. If you stayed sober, if you helped other addicts, if you didn’t drink or use even though things were rough, I love your life. Hell, I want your life. By staying sober your existence is already better than it was and exponentially more awesome than most.

Okay, so what if we buy this revolutionary idea that life is actually okay. How do we deal with the ever-engulfing black hole of negativity closing in around us? I’m really not sure. Sorry—I’m not. For what it’s worth, I think a little cynicism in small doses is okay. I’m a card-carrying smart-ass who personally gets a lot of comfort out of being able to laugh at the world and the people in it.

But I also know that things are less hideous when I’m not a total jerk. Little stuff like taking care of myself, getting enough sleep and eating something delicious can help ensure that I won’t act like a total nightmare and ruin everyone’s day around me. When none of that works and my attitude still sucks, I have to pull out the big guns (no, not literally). I have do something really hard: think of someone other than myself. I know. Drag. But it works every time. Texting another addict, showing up to a meeting or just laughing with a group of sober people makes the world a little less awful.

Now, just imagine how un-awful everything would be if we all did that at the same time.

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About Author

Sean Paul Mahoney is a writer, playwright, blogger, tweeter, critic, podcaster and smartass for hire. He lives in Portland, Oregon with two ridiculous cats and one amazing husband. His book of essays Now That You’ve Stopped Dying will be published by Zephyr Bookshelf in fall 2018.